Fascinating, like a scary movie in miniature: Smiling as always by Penazza

Läs mera av Penazzas texter på https://penazzas.wordpress.com/

Smiling as always

I had watch her for a long time at the office. Walking around in her posh clothes and her always smiling lips

So young, so careless. Archived files in alphabetical order, answered the phone smiled and giggled at the boss´s bad jokes. And bad they were.

I think the boss wanted to shag her. I could see it, how he touched her when he tought no one were watching.

That old dog! She was to young for him, but it felt as if she didn´t mind him touching her. Caressing her breasts in secret. But i saw. God knows that I saw it. Although I did not want to see. It made me sick.

I asked her out once. She just stared at me. Like I was some sort of moron or a freak. And then she just laugh at me. Bright giggling laugh that echoed in my soul.

But I couldn´t get her out of me mind. Some nights, perhaps all nights, I dreamt about her. Her body naked close to mine. Sexy and hot. Wanting me to shag her. And I did. I did, I did. Over and over.

I shagged her brains out and she loved it. In my dreams she wanted me. Screaming my name in the dark. Pressed her crotch against my hard cock. In my dreams she let me shag her how ever I wanted to.

But when I awoke I was alone and miserable as always. And my cock erected.

Every day her presence tortured me. Like she knew she was teasing me, and got an thrill out of it. She was palying an tantalizing game with my heart, soul and body.

My heart crumbled like a dry cake in an iron press when she was around. Ignored me.

I could not stand it anymore. I had to do something to make some peace to my soul.

So one night I was following her, from a safe distance. She was so beautiful. A red coat that ended at her slender calves. Her blonde silky hair tacked in a strict knot. Black purse in her lily-white hand.
She strode confidently. Her head up and her steps purposeful. She knew she was good-looking. And damn she was.

It was a late night. The stores were closed and she stopped by one of the stores window and looked at the the fancy dresses that were shown on those faceless mannequins.

The street was empty. Not a living soul around. I walked up to her. She notis me in the reflextion of the window and turned around. She had that look on her face. That patronizing look that she always gave me.

“Are you following me you pervert?” She said. Her voice soundes so callous and and fierce.

I don´t know why but I grabbed her by her troath and pressed her lips against mine.
At first she tried to get away from me. Pushing me as hard as she could. But I held her tightly against me.

After a while she felt relaxed in my arms. Her lips changed from stiff to soft. So soft they were. Her breathing calmed down. Oh my God she loved it. Finally she realized that I was the one for her. Her soft lips accepting mine, her body who felt relaxed in my arms  proved it all. She loved me. She loved ME. My heart was filled with happiness. My soul finally felt at peace and and my body ached no longer.

Then she started to feel so heavy. Her body sort of felt like jelly in my arms.

Oh my god what had I done? Her blue eyes stared at me. Not in a deprecation way but in a emty hollow way. The sparkling light was gone.  But her lips were still smiling, as if she was happy.

And may be she was happy, like me. Anyway I felt less tortured. The anxiety was gone. Just a sense of peace that spread within my body when I left her on the pavement, smiling as always.

Om mia bergenheim

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